A vegan café in Memphis has gone into hiding after getting into an online spat over a nude toddler.
The saga, dubbed #ButtholeGate by social media users, began when a customer left Imagine Vegan café a two-star review on Google.
"On the real, I eat here all the time," the customer wrote a week ago. "I still probably will [because] I like to go out and there are few options available to me BUT y'all listen.
"During my visit, a bare butt naked baby was running around, stood up on a table with its black they're so dirty feet, and bent over to show me it's butthole [sic].
"I wish I was exaggerating. This is like while I'm eating."
The upset customer also claimed another child was "yodelling and staring at me during my meal".
"I get it's a family establishment and kids do weird things but naked baby was running around for like 15 minutes while all the workers are just standing to the side talking and laughing over it."
The owners of the café took to Facebook to defend themselves, but only made things worse. A lot, lot worse.
"I am about to start calling out names and pictures of people who leave us bad reviews," Imagine Vegan Café wrote. "You will no longer be allowed to come and dine at Imagine."
So far, so whatever, right? But this is when the café's owners stuck those "black they're so dirty" feet in their mouths. Responding to comments left on the original post, Imagine Vegan Café said they "couldn't even begin to care" what people thought.
"Anyone who would not dine at our restaurant because there could possibly be a naked baby is not someone we want to serve anyway."
Then the café admitted the one-year-old wasn't even potty trained.
"There is nothing in the world wrong with this," the café insisted. "In cities across America it is becoming legal for grown women to walk around topless and just about anytime you turn on the TV you will see some sort of naked adult."
The café then claimed it was stated on the menu that the 21-month-old might occasionally be running around in her birthday suit.
"Periodically she will not have a diaper on and that is life."
This just confused everyone.
"How do naked children running around NOT violate health & safety codes?" asked one person.
"Poor business practices and blatant health code violations. These people need to decide between running a restaurant and running a daycare center," said another.
'Leave your expectations at the door'
The owners said they didn't care about being professional, because the animals and their children come first, then deleted both their Twitter and Facebook accounts.
The café's website is still online, the front page proudly stating that sometimes "there may be children running around your table, singing very loudly".
On the other hand, "sometimes you will have a very quiet, candlelight experience. So please leave your expectations at the door".
Or leave them on Google, and face being called out.
#ButtholeGate on Twitter: The best responses
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