3 News: Best of the Week - November 7, 2014

  • Breaking
  • 07/11/2014

We're only a week into November, but if shops are going to bust out the Christmas decorations already then it's no surprise the news silly season is off to a flyer.

But to fly, you must first have wings – something an Australian pilot obviously forgot when he decided to grab a pint in Newman, Western Australia. The thirsty 37-year-old didn't have a pilot's licence and his wingless two-seater plane was a pretty hopeless choice of getaway vehicle when the police showed up, in a country where even doctors can fly.

On the other side of the country in Warrnambool, Victoria, a woman was probably wishing cars could get off the ground when she was run over by her own dog

Meanwhile in Queensland, a news cameraman found himself at the top of the bulletin after staring down the barrel of a gun – the scoop of Peter Steer's life was almost his last.

"He got off his bike and approached me and said, 'I've got a story for you.' I said 'Well mate, you better hurry because I'm going to a shooting,' and he said, 'Mate, I'm the shooter.'"

It all went downhill when the shooter stole his car and crashed it into an LPG tank.

That wasn't the dumbest thing an Australian did this week, however – that title surely goes to 26-year-old Harrison who decided to surf the corpse of a whale in the process of being torn apart by sharks.

"Mum thinks I'm an idiot. Dad's not too proud either," he said afterwards.  

Taking just as big a risk this week was daredevil Nik Wallenda, who crossed a tightrope between two Chicago skyscrapers more than 50 storeys in the air – but no one's calling him stupid, maybe due to the lack of sharks circling beneath. Just 182m of freefall onto good ol' rock-hard concrete. Nothing to worry about.

But even that wasn't the most ridiculous thing to happen in Chicago this week. Following the All Blacks' mauling of the USA Eagles, the Chicago Sun-Times acknowledged the "Aussie" team's superiority.  

Obviously the presence of effervescent Kiwi pop star Kimbra screaming on the sidelines of Soldier Field wasn't enough to make it known where the All Blacks are from. She put her vocal chords to better use on the Late Show with David Letterman however, briefly hogging the limelight before everyone realised it was Lorde's 18th birthday.

Sticking with the US – they say everything's bigger in Texas and while that may not have referred specifically to golf clubs before, it might now. Michael Furrh, best-known for once hitting three balls in a single swing, has set a new record for successfully pulling off a drive with a 6.09m club.

Over in Europe the big news, at least in the animal dancing world, has been the musical canine freestyle champs in Germany where dogs bust a move to the sounds of Phil Collins. Or maybe it was snarky Twitterers mocking Russell Brand with chants of 'PARKLIFE!' or Russians tearing down a gigantic iPhone statue because Apple CEO Tim Cook is gay.

Either way, New Zealand's not getting off the hook this week – especially after the freak-out that followed a comedian making a joke about our accent.

One of the papers today ran a column listing other things in the world John Oliver could be mocking, but somehow forgot to include the All Blacks' new Spinal Tap-inspired "blackest jerseys ever". How much more black could they be? None more black. It's a surprise the jerseys' numbering doesn't stop at 11.

In other All Blacks news this week, Israel Dagg and Jonah Lomu might have found themselves on the wrong side of the law after tweeting their support for Prime Minister John Key on election day.

Finally this week, a Californian sea otter has found worldwide fame, and all it had to do was almost die. Spoiler alert: it doesn't.

3 News

source: newshub archive