Beware, there is a very good chance that, like me, you'll look at this film's cool trailers and think this new Fantastic Four looks good.
It is not.
The cast is good; Miles Teller, Kate Mara, Michael B Jordan and Jamie Bell are our titular four, with Toby Kebbell joining the fantastic fray as the soon to be villainous Dr Doom.
We will spend most of the movie with them before they get their mostly unwelcome superpowers, as the phrase "origins story" is explored to its fullest potential.
Reed Richards, his bestie Ben Grimm, Sue and Johnny Storm all end up in the Baxter Foundation's big lab, using their collective and impressive genius to build the world's first teleporter.
They will eventually teleport themselves to another dimension, and then the film ends.
Trust me, the only disappointing thing about that is that it didn't end sooner.
Fantastic in name alone, this film is far from it. A great cast ordinarily, this script and its delivery renders them entirely under-baked, devoid of any chemistry, gravitas or charm.
Top heavy on set-up and woefully slim on the action, Fantastic Four should only describe the number of minutes it takes to choose a ticket to something else.
One star.
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Fantastic Four:: Director: Josh Trank :: Starring: Miles Teller, Kate Mara, Michael B Jordan, Jamie Bell, Toby Kebbell, Reg E Cathey, Tim Blake Nelson:: Rating: M - Violence:: Running Time: 106 minutes:: Release Date: August 6, 2015
