Former Bachelor US star Colton Underwood has documented his emotional journey to coming out as gay in a new Netflix series.
"I didn't want to be gay," Underwood says in the trailer for Coming Out Colton.
"And the main voices in my head were just telling me, 'You'll get through this, you'll get through this'."
The now 29-year-old, a Christian who was previously known as 'the virgin Bachelor' during his stint on the 23rd season of the reality series, came out in April.
"Never thought I was gonna come out. I thought I was gonna die with this secret," he said in the teaser clip.
"The reason I'm coming out is because I'm ashamed and I'm kind of mortified of what got me into this position in the first place."
Underwood previously told Variety he had been "blackmailed" before coming out after visiting a spa for gay men.
Elsewhere in the trailer, the former football star tackles the prospect of coming out to his father, telling a friend that even the thought of it made him "anxious and nervous".
Later, he can be seen telling his dad: "I backed myself into a corner running from who I am… Basically what I’m trying to tell you is, I'm gay."
"Since confronting it, this is the best I've ever felt," he added through tears.
Underwood also addresses his fraught relationship with Cassie Randolph, who he coupled up with on The Bachelor in 2019. The pair broke up in May 2020, and later that same year Randolph filed a temporary restraining order against Underwood, reportedly alleging he had stalked and harassed her, as well as putting a tracking device on her car.
"You went off the rails," Underwood's dad tells him at one stage, referring to the legal issues.
"I put a poor girl through hell of my own insecurities," he says in the trailer. "I was starting to hurt other people outside of just myself."
Underwood's journey will be documented over six half-hour episodes on Netflix.
