Tori Spelling shared a vulnerable moment on the debut episode of her podcast, misSPELLING.
Spelling, who filed for divorce from Dean McDermott on March 29, started the episode by admitting she had not yet told McDermott that she'd filed the paperwork. At the time of the episode's recording, it had just become "public," she said.
"I have to call him right now. He's at work. This sucks," she said.
The Beverly Hills, 90210 actress explained that she was told she could only inform her ex about her filing "once it was accepted and publicly posted."
She is then heard calling McDermott and leaving a message, saying that she needs to speak with him.
"I'm super nervous because I don't like confrontation," she said after she'd hung up.
McDermott calls her back while she's recording the episode, and Spelling recorded her portion of the conversation.
After they spoke, Spelling tells her friends in the room with her that she's "never felt more alone in 50 years."
"I don't feel worth loving. That's the truth," she said.
The two were married for 18 years, but Spelling said that she's wanted to file for "like 15 years" but didn't because of the couple's five kids.
"We always say, ‘Hey, it made it 18 years. It shouldn't have made it 18 years," Spelling said. "And I think he would say the same thing if he and I had a real heart-to-heart. It would have been over a lot sooner."
Spelling added that the two started having problems just months after they got together.
"We had this very, quick, passionate falling in love period," she said. "Everyone talks about red flags. I like saying that I just like to make dresses out of red flags and then proceed."
She mentioned that anger issues contributed to the couple's issues.
