Born and bred in Whakatāne, Moses Thornton's life was a battle from the start.
Raised in the gangs, her early years were tainted by addiction, violence, and despair.
"I was a meth addict for 8 years and an alcoholic since I was 15 years old," Thornton said. "I was raised in the Black Power and this cycle led me down a dark and ugly path of destruction. "
Looking back on her upbringing, she thought "it was normal,"
"Until I realised, it's not," she said.
In a heartfelt post to the 'Moko Kauae Aotearoa' Facebook Page, Thornton shared her harrowing journey alongside photos of her newly adorned moko kauae.
"I have been inspired by this rōpu for a few years," she wrote. "And now it's my turn to give back."
"I've been suicidal, I've worked as a prostitute, I've been a victim of domestic violence, where I fled my hometown for my safety and raised my kids on my own."
But amidst the chaos, addiction and pain, an eye-opening experience altered everything. "My life changed when I had an encounter with Atua (God)," she shared.
It sparked a journey of redemption, leading to 10 years of sobriety.
"I had to grow through the seasons of my life," she explained. "To be in full knowing of who I am."
Whakapapa: Breaking the Cycle
Moses Thornton (Ngāti Awa) descends from a royal line of wāhine who mau moko kauae, and now she has finally unveiled her own.
She explained receiving moko is something you are called to do.
"It's not just an idea, it's not just a passion, it's not a hope," she said.
"You feel it, and then things just start to show itself to you."
In some whānau and iwi, it may be tikanga that to receive your tāonga, your elder sibling must receive theirs first- especially if you are the 'baby' of the family.
Thornton is the youngest of 16, however, none of her sisters wear moko kauae.
"So, I had to wait," she said.
With that in mind, she aims to encourage other wāhine alike to not let other people stop them from receiving what is "rightfully" theirs.
Thornton reflected on her moko kauae journey and emphasised that wanting to receive her tāonga was a blessing.
She explained the calling to unveil her moko kauae helped her "get off the drugs and the alcohol."
"It was the actual motivator to me getting sober, me getting clean," she said.
She needed a clean tinana (clean body) to carry something that is so meaningful and vulnerable to her.
Thornton saw the experience as an opportunity to learn her native tongue, Te Reo Māori. A language she was stripped of due to the impacts of colonisation and disconnection.
"I went to learn my reo, and I came out with a level four understanding."
For Thornton, her moko kauae was more than ink on skin; it was a revelation of her inner strength and resilience. "My life story is in my moko kauae," she declared.
Her journey was not solitary; it was intertwined with her journey of sobriety but also with her role as a māmā of five.
"They were my motivation to break the cycle," she said. "To be the change I wanted to see."
The decision to receive her moko kauae was not taken lightly. It symbolised a rebirth - a shedding of past pain and embracing of her true identity.
"It's almost a revealing of what's already been in us," she mused.
Resurgence of Tikanga: Revealing one's truest self
Surrounded by whānau, and in the comfort of her own whare, Thornton embarked on this transformative journey.
"It was very intimate," she said.
She explained she chose her home because that is where a lot of her spiritual and emotional growth occurs.
"I went this route so I wouldn't be discouraged."
"Because there is a lot of negativities around getting your moko kauae, people think they can put their opinion on you, and people can really pull you back."
Her talented kaitā was her brother, Ed Harawira, who guided her through the process of unveiling her moko, symbolising her path from darkness into light.
She explained it made the process even more meaningful, to have whānau, her own blood, reveal such a treasure.
Each stroke was more than just a mark on her skin; it was a passage through her past, a journey through the impossible, the hardship, and the darkness she had overcome.
She had previously heard stories from others that during the process they had fallen asleep and that they did not feel the mamae (hurt).
She had a completely different experience, reiterating that her skin was extremely tough when getting her moko kauae.
However, she said she was meant to feel it.
"I felt it all."
"Because those strokes, they took me back to my journey of the impossible, the hardship, the darkness."
With each stroke, she felt herself breaking free, shedding the weight of her past and embracing the promise of her future.
She said that the right side of her chin was especially painful, and after sharing kōrero with her brother, he explained that taha mātau, the right side represented tāne, it represented males.
This kōrero connected with her deeply.
"All the men in my life have caused me nothing but pain," she said.
"But that pain, that mamae, has led me to my purpose and it was special."
She reminisced on the powerful and spiritual journey of receiving her moko kauae.
"I had my late mum and kuia come through, and I felt that presence,"
She felt a sense of pride wash over her. It was not only a moment of reckoning - but also a culmination of her struggles and triumphs, her pain, and her resilience.
"It was a huge pivotal point in my life."
And as the last line was drawn, she felt a profound sense of wholeness wash over her.
"It's a rebirth, a revival," she declared. "A revealing of the person I carry inside out."
Ingoa: Naming of tāonga
Some wāhine may choose to name their moko but some may choose not to.
Thornton was one of many who chose to lay down a name for her tāonga.
'Toa o te Ariki' would be the ingoa, which came to her the night of receiving her moko kauae.
"I kept hearing the words toa, and then ariki, over and over again." she said.
Toa o te Ariki is kupu Māori for Jesus and aligns her faith with her Māori whakapapa.
"It's a tribute to my battles and my faith in the Lord," she explained. "A testament to every storm I've overcome."
This is why Thornton says her story is in her moko kauae.
The cross in her design represents her whakapono, her faith in the lord which pulled her out of darkness.
With Moses being the baby of the whānau, the mangopare sits at the bottom, representing her place as the youngest sibling. The lines etched across her skin; represent every "storm" she has overcome.
In the aftermath of her moko kauae unveiling, she found herself transformed.
With her tāonga proudly displayed on her face, she embraced a newfound sense of identity and purpose.
She added that before receiving her moko kauae, she felt as though she needed to "prove herself to wear it."
However, as soon as she received her tāonga, this feeling vanished away, but her drive for learning Te Reo Māori and tikanga kept growing.
"It's encouraged me to pursue my reo, so that I can communicate."
"So I can have the tools to kōrero and stand proud as Māori."
She also added that unveiling her moko kauae was a rebirth.
"It means my identity," she said.
"It means, mana wāhine, a place you know you belong. Because in the world today, where our worlds and our physical places can be changed, but your place of identity and where you come from, you carry that in your wairua."
Reflection: A warrior, survivor and proud wahine Māori
Today, Thornton stands tall like her maunga Pūtauaki, and is a beacon of empowerment. Her moko kauae serves as a reminder of her journey - from darkness to light, from despair to triumph. And in its sacred lines, she finds not just beauty, but a reflection of her truest self - a warrior, a survivor, and a proud wahine Māori.
Through day-to-day life, Thornton also stands as a beacon of hope for others. Through her mahi 'Legacy Sisterhood Empowerment', she offers support and healing to those battling their demons.
"We're losing too much of our own," she added. "But there's hope, and there's help."
She explained she first came to Legacy with a lot of trauma and a lot of heaviness.
"Even though I started a new journey and cleaned myself up, I still carry it. And triggers would sometimes open those wounds of my childhood."
"So Legacy was a platform where I learnt to heal, unpack, and forgive myself."
Her message to those struggling with their identity is clear: "Stay true to who you are. You don't have to go through struggles alone."
"Just like our ancestors that went before us, we live in their inheritance. It's ours, don't let anyone's opinions stop you from being who you are created to be."
