Duncan Garner: I'm going vegan and it's a terrifying ordeal

Duncan Garner is going vegan. Credit: The AM Show.

OPINION: At least I didn't promise to run down Queen Street nude. Not now. Not ever. I'd rather go vegan.

Yes, this is all my fault. I mouthed off. Too loose, too cocky, and you are making sure I can't weasel away and break my word.

First, let me remind you of my headless chicken, ahhhh, headless broccoli moment from a few months back.

"I'm so confident Labour won't poll this high on the night, or even high enough to govern alone, that if I'm wrong - and if either happens - I promise to become a vegan for a year."

By Sunday morning, you started reminding us, a chance to dance on my grave one by one, get Garner. Email after email you wanted to get me, hold me to account, do to me what I had done to others for years with much glee -  thank you for the feedback.

I hear you - I see how your votes have fallen, I'm not waiting for the specials to be counted to slide out of this. 

We in this AM Party have heard you.

So, veganism here I come. I AM going to try this.

It makes me nervous.

But, a couple of things I want to say first. 

I'm not doing it because I believe farmers are the devil.  I'm not doing it to save animals. And I do reserve the right to become a fully annoying member of the vegan society and become a judgemental tosser.

Now, for the record you have mostly been encouraging and kind, but when my son heard he said three words to me. The first two were 'what the' and the last one indicates I need to work on my parenting. 

He just asked me to cook him a t-bone steak. I think I'm going to struggle to avoid cross-contamination through all of this.

But back to the nice people. Nadia Lim's giving me a sample of her 'My Food Bag' plant-based menu for a week, thank you.

My neighbour Louise woke me up from a nap to gift me a litre of Almond Milk, which I tried immediately with Weetbix. That was dinner.

They've offered to help me should I run out of ideas, so see you tonight Lou.

I'll miss cheese, meat, dairy products and I'll take medical advice to make sure I don't die in a ditch for veganism. 

Let's not be silly about this. 

But I might become a flexitarian, who knows.  But I can tell you this morning, I'll give it a go.

A man has nothing more than his word. So, yes, I will be embarking on this terrifying ordeal, although, I think it'll just be the eating part for now.

Baby steps for a baby vegan.

I went for a shop last night, grabbed some Kumara Rosti, a vegan pizza, some berries and some plant-based meat patties.

They were right next to the pies and sausage rolls.

As the cool kids say, "the struggle is real".

Duncan Garner hosts The AM Show.

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