Top rugby referee Nigel Owens has revealed the private agony he faced over his sexuality, including asking a doctor to chemically castrate him when he realised he was gay.
Owens says the pressure of refereeing the 2015 Rugby World Cup between the All Black and Australia was nothing compared to accepting his homosexuality.
The Welsh referee - the first openly gay man to officiate at the highest level of the game – says he suffered from bulimia and also attempted suicide because being gay felt "totally alien" to him.
He described how he went to a doctor and said: "l do not want to be gay. Can I get chemically castrated?"
Owens came out to his parents at age 34. He says they found the news "difficult at first" but were totally supportive, as was the Welsh rugby union.
"Refereeing that World Cup final between Australia and New Zealand in front of 85,000 people and the millions of people watching at home, scrutinising every single decision you make under a huge amount of pressure, was nothing compared to the challenge of accepting who I was," Owens told the BBC.
"Unless you are happy with who you are, you cannot excel and be the best you can be at whatever you are doing. You cannot enjoy life if you are not happy within yourself."
Newshub.
