Amy Satterthwaite admits she was "gutted" when she found out she had been dropped as White Ferns captain.
Last week, New Zealand Cricket announced that interim skipper Sophie Devine would take over the role full-time, despite Satterthwaite's return from maternity leave.
But NZC and Satterthwaite are both adamant that becoming a mum didn't cost her the role.
On Monday, she returned to training with the White Ferns for the first time since becoming a mum.
"It's been a bit nice actually," says Satterthwaite. "Although batting on grass wickets has been a bit different."
And that's not the only thing that's different, as she returns to discover she's been demoted to vice-captain.
"To be perfectly honest, I was gutted," Satterthwaite admits.
But she doesn't believe that becoming a mum cost her the captaincy.
"No, I don't think you can look at it like that. I think obviously I did go away and have a child, but at the end of the day, it's [coach Bob Carter's] decision to make and he's got to do what's right for the team."
Both NZC and the NZ Cricket Players' Association are confident the right process was adhered to.
"They've spoken widely with people and they've made a decision, and that's really tough on Amy," Players' Association boss Heath Mills says.
While it's a bitter pill to swallow, Satterthwaite respects the decision.
"I really enjoyed my time as captain, so you always want to have that challenge and it was a huge honour when I did."
The 33-year-old now wants to focus on working with new skipper Devine to lift the Cricket World Cup when it's held in New Zealand next year.
"Everyone gets to lift it when you win it, so you have to look at it from that perspective."
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