Australian tennis star Nick Kyrgios has spoken about his struggle with depression which he says left him in a "lonely, dark place".
Kyrgios, who started seeing a psychologist in 2018, has been criticised for not caring enough about his tennis career.
The 25-year-old has not played since February after limiting his travel because of the coronavirus pandemic and dropped to 45 in the ATP world tour rankings.
"I felt like no one wanted to know me as a person, they wanted to get a hold of me as a tennis player and use me," Kyrgios told Stellar magazine. "I didn't feel like I could trust anyone. It was a lonely, dark place."
Kyrgios recalled a time in Shanghai when he "didn't want to see the light of day".
"There are people who live and breathe tennis and that's fine. I'm not saying that's wrong or right," he said. "I've reached a level of freedom in my life that I really don't care what anyone thinks of me."
Kyrgios has received several fines for his on-court meltdowns and was handed a suspended 16-week ban by the ATP for "aggravated behaviour" last year.
"On tour there's a seven-month block when I don't get to see my family or be home, so I'm really taking advantage of everything going on at the moment," Kyrgios said.
Kyrgios is hoping to return to action in time for the Australian Open in January.
Reuters
Where to find help and support:
- Shine (domestic violence) - 0508 744 633
- Women's Refuge - 0800 733 843 (0800 REFUGE)
- Need to Talk? - Call or text 1737
- What's Up - 0800 WHATS UP (0800 942 8787)
- Lifeline - 0800 543 354 or (09) 5222 999 within Auckland
- Youthline - 0800 376 633, text 234, email talk@youthline.co.nz or online chat
- Samaritans - 0800 726 666
- Depression Helpline - 0800 111 757
- Suicide Crisis Helpline - 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)
- Shakti Community Council - 0800 742 584
