Warning: This article contains graphic images.
What do you say when part of your scalp is peeling off and blood is pouring down your face, right after being mauled by a grizzly bear?
Apparently, it can be summed up pretty easily: "Yeah, life sucks in bear country."
Todd Orr was mauled despite yelling 'hey bear' every 30 seconds as he hiked in the Madison Valley, Montana, just to make sure he didn't startle any.
It didn't work.
He came across a mother grizzly bear with her cubs and she charged at him.
"I yelled a number of times so she knew I was human and would hopefully turn back. No such luck," Mr Orr wrote on Facebook.
He sprayed "the sh** out of her" with bear spray but it didn't work either.
He went down face-first into the dirt and wrapped his arms around his neck to protect it.
"The force of each bite was like a sledgehammer with teeth," Mr Orr said.
(Todd Orr / Facebook)
"After a couple minutes, but what seemed an eternity, she disappeared."
She came back again further down the trail and Mr Orr says he would've died if she came back a third time.
Either way, it was a miracle he survived.
Mr Orr then returned to his truck, laid down some jackets over the seat, and headed to a hospital.
"When I got into cell service, I made a quick call to my girlfriend to ask how her morning was going, before freaking her out and asking her to bring me a change of clean clothes to the hospital," he recounted.
Mr Orr was stitched back together over eight hours, including the gash in the side of his head.
But he's looking on the bright side.
"Not my best day, but I'm alive."