Master bedroom and ensuite week is always high tension on The Block NZ, but this week took it to a whole new level as twins Julia and Ali established themselves as Public Enemies numbers one and two.
The sisters were caught up in two major drams - they had a bottle of wine stashed away in their bottom drawer, and were nabbed taking nights off the block. Naturally, the other teams jumped on it all as an opportunity to grab some extra cash off them as punishment. That was Julia and Ali's theory anyway - I have a suspicion that perhaps it would have been handled better if the twins were better as human beings.
But hey, what do I know?
Anyway, the other teams penned a letter to site foreman Peter Wolfkamp, proposing a punishment for house three breaking the rules by "drinking and being absent overnight".
The twins denied all the allegations, handling it gracefully with such deflections as "you guys are just full of shit", and "I don't know what they're talking about" - an interesting move when every part of your day is documented on camera.
Eventually it was all resolved, leaving time for everyone to focus on churning out the most romantic spaces on the block - the master walk-in wardrobe. Oh, and the bedroom and ensuite as well.
Andy and Nate
Suited and safety booted, last week's winners donned the worst ties ever to see the light of day to help keep momentum going this week. Their goal was to 'tone things down' for this week's ensuite, after their last bathroom attempt was absolutely ripped apart.
So Nate, naturally, decided to wallpaper the ceiling.
Okay.
The bedroom was a vivid shade of blue that reminded me of a swimming pool changing room, but like, in a good way. A beautiful leather ex-gym mat and pink artwork bought elegance to the brightness, and showed even more that these boys know what they're doing. The bedside tables were bloody awful but you can't have everything in life.
The judges' one qualm with the ensuite was the wall directly in front of the toilet, which they said was dangerous after a few wines. I personally would value the close, solid, presence to hold myself upright, but that's just me. Another solid effort lads. (Am I overly complimentary of their work because they're cute? Yes. Carry on.)
Julia and Ali
The girls were confident going into this reveal, stating they "definitely know what sophisticated rooms look like. We've lived in them our whole lives".
Unfortunately they didn't learn from their past mistakes, and wanted their room to feel like they were "in the middle of a forest". I mean they're probably drunk, so you can't blame them.
The forest theme was straight-up fecking awful, an opinion I wasn't alone in. It was what I can imagine it would've looked like if a 14-year-old said she liked Twilight while her house was being made over on Extreme Makeover Home Edition.
It was okay though, because the twins disagreed. So that was fine.
While the judges said the lights looked like a couple of half-deflated circus balloons, I thought personally they looked like internal organs. Again, Julia pointed out that the judges knew nothing about lighting. So that was fine.
The saving grace was the bathroom, which was basically the mirror image of the last one, gold tapware and everything. The judges loved it. So they obviously do know what they're talking about when it comes to bathrooms. Funny that.
Ling and Zing
Christchurch #lads Ling and Zing had #noregrets over the rift with the twins, with little time to focus on it. They had to focus (and for once in the series, focus they did) to try and get their room done, after being slated for last week's guest bedroom efforts.
To remedy last week's low score after a Fifty Shades of Grey-themed spare room, they decided to go for a design scheme almost exactly the same in their master.
Promising!
Don't get me wrong, neutrals are a gal's best friend. But if it's failed you once with the judges, why would you give it another shot?
Personally I like the bathroom and that waterfall-esque tapware got me absolutely fizzing but again, running out of time was their downfall. Another low score for the boys. Perhaps #someregrets then.
Stace and Yanita
Donned in tutus and Minnie-mouse ears, you would be forgiven for not taking these two besties seriously. But then they produced a master bedroom which was the entire length of their house, including a walk-in wardrobe, bathroom and wet room. It was risky, but boy, did it pay off.
The girls suffered their fair share of qualms, including a massive water leak which mirrored the south Canterbury and Otago flooding (little topical weather gag).
They managed to pull it together though, and produce the largest space of all the teams.
BUT THAT VIEW THOUGH. I have a personal adoration for the Sky Tower which comes from having lived in the North Island for less than a year, so that view was one of the best things I've ever seen. The statement wallpaper and hanging light were also both gorgeous, the weird dog bed on the end of the bed less so.
The judges criticized the poor proportions, observing: "You're not going to be living in the master bathroom." But I have to say with that lighting and tiling, there's a strong chance I probably would. Throw the bed's fur throw on the floor and I'd never have to leave.
The change-up in design wasn't enough to save them though, with Andy and Nate taking out another win.
The brothers-in-law are the team to beat. Can they make it three in a row?
Tune in next week to find out.
The Block NZ airs Monday-Wednesday at 7:30pm and Sundays at 7pm on Three.
